Des Moines, revisited

Some time has passed since the dreadful death march that was my 10k at USA Outdoors. Wounds have (mostly) healed, body has recovered, and passion is reignited. Running so poorly on the national stage can serve as a big motivator, and here I am, on July 1, up before the sun more eager than ever to begin a new training cycle. July is a clean slate.


But before moving on, I'll briefly recap my race in Des Moines. Every race -- great or terrible or just mediocre -- holds value; if you take the time to review, analyze, learn from it, and improve upon it, it was worthwhile.


The race was hot - both in temperature (86 degrees at race time!) and in pace. Superwoman Shalane Flanagan took it out hard from the gun and everyone followed. I knew it was going to be ugly when I started to lose contact with the pack after 5 laps. 20 solo laps later, I crossed the line (oof). 3 cups of water, 2 pukes in a trash can, and 1 good cry later, I was glad to close the chapter on this race.

Photo credit Oiselle
Reflecting back, what could I have done better? Prepare. I wasn't in 33:00 shape coming into the race, for a variety of reasons. I'd accepted that and was ready to do what I could with the tools in the toolbox, but there's no replacement for the strength that comes from months of uninterrupted, consistent training, and that was evident. Next time around, I'll have the workouts under my belt to allow myself a shot at a top 10 finish. Good thing is, I know what I need to do to be better prepared. I've been prepared before and I'll be prepared again. Add to that some Vitamin D and iron and I'll be ready!


With a finishing time of 36:30, one might say that I didn't do anything well in that race. But I'm choosing to find some positives. What can I be proud of? That I came to the starting line confident, even when I had reasons to doubt my readiness. I got my head in a good place and at least gave myself the chance to run well. Things obviously didn't go my way, but it wasn't for lack of a positive attitude. So much of running is mental, so this is a big step forward for me.


I'm also happy that I finished. It took every ounce of mental fortitude to finish that race and not drop out; as Shalane lapped me for the 3rd time (yep, 3, not a typo), as my pace slowed to slower than tempo pace, as my body shivered in chills despite the heat, I slowly rounded the track all 25 times. Next time I find myself in a tough spot in a race, I will think back to USA's and say, "Ah, this ain't that bad - nothing compared to Des Moines!" and be able to gut it through.

While I may have run a disappointing race, others performed inspiring feats. There's nothing quite like competing at a US Championship to leave you inspired and hungry for more. I'm particularly inspired by Shannon Rowbury's valiant last 100 meters in the 5k. After failing to make the World Championships team in the 1500 the day before, Shannon came back in the 5k and reeled in the field in the last 400, punching her ticket to Moscow down the home strech. It was truly inspiring to watch!

Photo credit Letsrun.com
So I head out for my run this morning motivated and hungry -- for the speed and strength of the Kaitlin of 2012, for PRs and podium finishes and so much more. Summer morning runs give way to big dreams, and the months ahead hold endless possibilities...

Letting the sun set on Des Moines, closing this chapter and looking ahead to the next one! A new season awaits!

Fear --> Faith

A year ago, I wanted nothing more than to compete at the Olympic Trials 10k. I'd thought about the Trials every day for 2 years, on each run striving to improve myself and get closer to my goal. More than anything, I wanted to be on the starting line, but instead,

I was at home

, watching the race on TV, 

glass

 bottle of wine in hand.

Fast forward 11 months to May 2013, a month before the

2013 USA Outdoor Track & Field National Championships

(the equivalent of the Olympic Trials in a non-Olympic year). Unlike the year before, I'd earned a spot on the starting line, by virtue of my 33:01 10k PR. And also unlike a year ago, racing was the LAST thing I wanted to do. Whereas in 2012 I would have given anything to race, in 2013 I found myself full of fear, dread, and doubt... 

Stormy track workout, representative of the stormy spring I've had...

You see, I've had a roller coaster past few months. Running was not going well and some health stuff was way out of whack (more on that in another blog post). I'd tell my body to do X and it would do Y. I'd say, "Run faster!" and my legs would say, "Hell no!" Talk about the polar opposite of being in the best shape of your life... A body that's failing you doesn't exactly inspire confidence, and once those seeds of doubt are planted, they grow like weeds, taking over your sense of self and replacing the faith and confidence you've nurtured over the years...

So I was faced with a choice - end my season early and scratch out of USA's, or solider on and give it a go. 

What'd I pick? No cliffhangers or suspense here - I picked the latter. I'm here in Des Moines, athlete credential in hand, gearing up for my first track national championship in about 8 hours!

And I'll be showing up at the starting line not with doubt or fear, but with a renewed faith in my abilities. After sorting out the health issues that were plaguing me the past few weeks, I've run workouts that are reminiscent of the Kaitlin of last spring. And with solid workouts, confidence gradually returns.

Add to that plenty of encouragement from Coach Dad, Assistant Coach Little Bro Brendan, and Main Cheerleader Mom, mix in super support from Dena Evans and New Balance Silicon Valley, and finally stir in lots of love from my fiance, and you've got an athlete ready to race a 10k!

Earlier this month, I set the following goal for myself: 

And at 8:20 PM CT tonight, that's exactly what I plan to do! Hang with the pack (and try not to get lapped by Shalane!), run with confident thoughts in my head and joy in my heart, and HAVE SOME FUN! Because that's why we're really out here, right? Because we love it! :-)

Tune in to 

http://www.usatf.tv/ 

 to watch me joyfully race 25 laps (and be sure to catch my little bro Brendan in the men's 10k right after my race!). Go Greggs! :)